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D-Day, or, excuse me, the wedding day, arrived quite early, and Sharlene and I were up at the crack of dawn, and in my case, I was in a kind of a daze, no doubt a hangover from my bartending and entertaining duties from the previous night. Aside from that, it was a day of attending to last minute details, like re-arranging the furniture inside the house, moving our vehicles to side streets, to allow for parking, and an endless variety of last minute details to take care of.
Photos: It's 10 in the morning, and the tables are set up, the punch and ice tea is made, the soft drinks are in the cooler and iced down, and things are ready to go. By 0700, Casey, Sandy, Larissa and I were out on the patio, putting up last-minute decorations, straightening chairs that had somehow become rearranged during the previous evening's festivities, last-minute cleaning, and a myriad of other things that had to be done before the ceremony started. A couple of weeks prior to the wedding, Sharlene had made fliers, and contacted all of the neighbors in our area, to give them a "heads-up" about the fact that we were going to have 70-plus people here for Casey's wedding, with lots of cars, and that many neighborhood activities would be affected. Our neighbors were very gracious in allowing our self-imposed inconvenience upon the neighborhood, and a couple of them volunteered for some of our guests to park in their driveways, and one neighbor even volunteered the use of his extra dumpster! We're fortunate that we have wonderful, understanding, neighbors.
Left: The big top tent is set up, and the chairs are lined up. Note the green canopies to the left of the photo; they provided another 10 feet of shaded space which was crucial to the outcome of the wedding. Right: Deb, Tim, Sandy and Jake attend to one of the many last-minute issues before Tim marries Casey. My role in the before-the-wedding activities consisted of mostly ensuring that everything outside was ready for our guests, as Sharlene's job was to prepare the inside of our house for the wedding. Perhaps the most important job I fulfilled was to make a morning ice run, to make sure our guests would be treated to cold drinks, and I purchased plenty of ice for the freezer, in order to refresh our drinks. I purchased 12, 7-lb bags of ice, and stocked the ice chests with plenty of bottled water and soft drinks, and stashed the remaining 6 bags of ice in the garage freezer, to hold in reserve, to restock the ice chests later in the day. After the ice run was finished, it was time to make the fruit punch and ice tea, which we made available to our guests in a couple of iced-down 5-gallon picnic coolers. The day before, I'd constructed a sign, in the shape of an arrow that pointed towards our house, with the word "Wedding" written on it in large, block letters. I duct-taped this to the rear window of my truck, and parked our truck on Faulkner Drive, where Austen Court takes off, to assist some of our guests who'd never visited our home before.
Left: Deb, Tim's mom, and Tim pose on the patio, just before the ceremony begins. Right: Minister Larry Sutter and groom Tim, at the alter, under the big top tent. By 1100, all of the wedding party had arrived, and things were starting to come together. Sharlene's long-time best friend, Laura arrived, and I helped her bring in a card table, to set up for guests to sign a wedding book. Laura was very instrumental and helpful to us, in greeting and assisting arriving guests, as Sharlene and I couldn't be everywhere at once. We had moved our recliners, end tables and coffee table from the family room, into the den, in order to create space to set up tables, so those who preferred to remain inside the air conditioned house had that option. We also rearranged the living room to allow additional tables, and we set up the living room dining table as a place where our guests cold drop off the gifts they brought. Between the wedding decorations and the rearranged furniture, the downstairs of our house looked very different.
Left: Sandy, Casey's grandmother, is escorted by Tim's brother Mike. Right: Donna, Sharlene's mom, is escorted to her seat by Tim's brother "Chóle." Upstairs had changed significantly as well, as it was decided that the master bedroom was to used as a hair salon, makeup room, and dressing room for the female members of the wedding party, and one of our guest bedrooms was to be used as a changing room for the guys. I had the foresight to remove the clothes I was to wear to the wedding before the girls took over our bedroom, as I didn't care to embarrass any of them, nor did I care to embarrass myself as well. Anyway, as of about noon, our bedroom was filled with women, as Sharlene performed last-minute hair touch-ups to the female members of Casey's wedding party. The wedding was due to start at 1430, so by about 1300, I had finished my share of the wedding preparations, and I felt it was time to get out of my grubby shorts and tank top, and into my slacks and tie. So I went up the stairs, shaved, took a shower, and put on all of that stuff that makes a guy smell good. In the bedroom I got dressed with the clothes that I'd hung in the closet, except that a couple of small details were missing: My black belt, and my tie chain. Darn! I'd left them in the bedroom, and the bedroom was in use with all of the girls, so going into there to fetch the missing items wasn't an option. I was in luck, as I head Sandy downstairs, so I yelled at her and asked her to come up and lend me some assistance. I explained to her my predicament, and described exactly where my belt and tie chain could be found. (Note: I'm very "anal" and I always put my stuff away in the same place!) Anyway, she found my missing items, and my day was salvaged.
Left: Casey's grandmother, Annette, is escorted by Tim's brother Jess. Right: Rory escorts Sharlene down the sidewalk to her seat.
Left: Deb, Tim's mom, is escorted by her brother Dave, Tim's uncle. Right: The groomsmen are present. Since I am the stepfather-of-the-bride and one of the owners of the house, Sharlene had assigned me the primary roll of host, which is logical, and I acquired the secondary, way-distant roll of photographer. I knew about 90% of our guests, but there were many of our guests who didn't know one another, so my primary job was to greet arriving guests, attend to any needs they presented, such as introducing people to one another, keeping a high profile, and "mingling" among our guests, to, shall we say, "Show the flag," which an old Navy term. Actually, I savored the role, as host, that I was given, as I'm the sort of person who can walk, uninvited, into a cocktail party full of strangers, and actually act as if I'm an invited guest, and I can strike up conversations with strangers, and enjoy myself at the same time, and act as I belong. Outside of the socializing, I acted as single-point-of-contact for anything, and everything, answering such mundane tasks as "Where is the bathroom? Where are the drinks? Could you please bring me a bottled water? The ice chest need more ice, etc..." Then, there were other tasks like helping some the somewhat physically-challenged guests to get comfortable, bringing in wedding presents, refilling the coolers with bottled water, sodas, and ice as needed, helping the caterers set up, assisting Larry, the minister set-up his equipment when he arrived, and answering some of the many last-minute question posed by the disc jockey. Oh yes, etc., etc., and etc.. Laura and I performed most of these tasks, as Sharlene was upstairs getting the girls ready for the big event.
Left: Kim Bennett, the first bridesmaid, arrives... Right: Followed by Sharon Pelfrey. By 1430, everybody was seated under the big top tent, and the ceremony was ready to begin, but the photographer we'd hired was absent. Well, when you have a wedding at your home, something always goes wrong, and the absence of the photographer appeared to be "the something." Sharlene rushed up to me and excitedly exclaimed: "The photographer is missing, so you're it." I told her that I could handle it, so now I had an extra task to perform, besides being the host: Full-time photographer. Well, my it status didn't last too long, as the photographer showed up, just as the ceremony was starting, and profusely apologized her tardiness, explaining that the traffic was bad, and she had got lost. We didn't doubt her a bit, as many of our guests had complained about the traffic, along busy I-80.
Left: Along comes bridesmaid Karrie Ogle... Right: Followed by Nicole Conry. It was interesting to note that the weather service had predicted that Saturday, June 23, 2007 would be usually cool, with a predicted high of only 84, and partly cloudy skies. The weather had been a wild card for us, as if you've ever lived in, or visited the Sacramento Valley in late June, then you know that 84 is way, way below average. However, the weather-guessers were wrong, as the temperature at the start of the ceremony was 93 degrees, and would reach 95 degrees before the sun went down. Larry Sutter, or co-worker, friend, and the minister at Casey's wedding, had already set up his sound equipment, and a half hour or so before the wedding was to begin, he was playing music that Casey had picked out for her wedding. The music before the wedding included such tracks as Celtic Women: Over the Rainbow, Celtic Women: The Last Rose of Summer, Schmidt and Jones: My Cup Runneth Over, A. David Lanz: Beloved, Four Aces: Love Is a Many-Splendored Thing, David Lanz: Variations on a Theme from Pachebel's Canon in D Major. I will describe the wedding ceremony and wedding vows from the script that Larry provided us, adding a few notes and comments of my own...
Left: The Matron of Honor, Larissa Pierce arrives... Right: Followed by the ring bearer our grandson, Paris Markovich, and the lovely flower girl, Tristen Pierce, the three year daughter of the Matron of Honor. Lighting of the Candles: The mothers of the Bride (Sharlene Rench) and the Groom (Deborah Bess) may each light one of the two candles. Processional: Bridal Processional Begins, to the tune of North: Unchained Melody (from Ghost soundtrack). * Minister and Groom enter from stage right. Wedding March begins, as Celtic Women: The Blessing (Processional) is played...
Left:
The wedding party is assembled and awaits the bride. Right:
Here comes the bride! Casey is escorted to the alter
by her uncle, Greg Yeilding. Opening Words of the Officiant (Call to Worship:) Friends, we have been invited here today to share with Casey Yeilding and Tim Pelfrey a very important moment in their lives. In the years they have been together, their love and understanding of each other has grown and matured and now they have decided to live their lives together as husband and wife. The Opening Prayer: Minister: Let us Pray: Our Father, love has been Your richest and greatest gift to the world. Love between a man and a woman, which matures into marriage is one of Your most beautiful types of love. Today, we celebrate that love. May Your blessing be on this wedding service. Protect, guide, and bless Casey and Tim in their marriage. Surround them and us with Your love now and always. Amen.
Left: Tim and Casey, at the alter, during the Opening Prayer. Right: Larry recites The Pledge to Casey and Tim. Congregation is seated.... The Giving in Marriage: Who gives this woman to be wedded to this man? Response: Their families and friends do! The Charge to Bride and Groom: Let me charge you both to remember, that your future happiness is to be found in mutual consideration, patience, kindness, confidence, and affection. Tim Pelfrey, it is your duty to love Casey as yourself, provide tender leadership, and protect her from danger. Casey Yeilding, it is your duty to treat Tim with respect, support him, and create a healthy, happy home. It is the duty of each of you to find the greatest joy in the company of the other; to remember that in both interest and affection, you are to be one and undivided.
Left: Tim puts The Ring on Casey's finger. Right: "Casey, receive and wear this ring as a symbol of my trust, my respect and my love for you." The Pledge: Tim Pelfrey, will you have Casey Yeilding to be your wife, to live together as friend and mate? Will you love her as a person, respect her as an equal, sharing joy as well as sorrow, triumph as well as defeat? And keep her beside you as long as you both shall live? He said, "I do!" Casey Yeilding, will you have Tim Pelfrey to be your husband, to live together as friend and mate? Will you love him as a person, respect him as an equal, sharing joy as well as sorrow, triumph as well as defeat? And will you keep him beside you as long as you both shall live? She replied "I do!" Wedding Vows:
Left: Tim and Casey have just lighted the Unity Candle, and are anticipating The Pronouncement. Right: "I now pronounce them to be husband and wife, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen." Exchanging of the Rings: Let's pray: Father, bless these rings which Casey and Tim have set apart to be viable signs of the inward and a spiritual bond which unites their hearts. As they give and receive these rings, may they testify to the world of the covenant made between them here. Amen.
Left: "Tim, you may now kiss your Bride..." Right: Casey and Tim walk down the aisle, as Mr. and Mrs. Tim Pelfrey. To the Groom: Tim, as you place this ring on Casey's fourth finger, repeat after me: Groom: Casey, receive and wear this ring as a symbol of my trust, my respect and my love for you. Minister: To the Bride: Casey, as you place this ring on Tim's fourth finger repeat after me: Bride: Tim, receive and wear this ring as a symbol of my trust, my respect, and my love for you. Lighting of the Unity Candle: The two outside candles have been lighted to represent both your lives in this moment. They are two
Left: The photographer that we hired does her thing, on the next door neighbor's lawn. They were gracious to allow some of our guests to park in their driveway. Right: The male members of the wedding party assemble on our front lawn. The Procurement: Minister: Now that Tim and Casey have given themselves to each other by the promise that they have exchanged, I pronounce them to be husband and wife, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of Holy Spirit. Amen. The Closing Prayer/Blessing: Minister: May the love of God be above you to overshadow you, beneath you to uphold you, before you to guide you, behind you to protect you, close beside you and within you to make you able for all things, and to reward your faithfulness with the joy and peace which the world cannot give... neither can it take away. Through Jesus Christ, our Lord, whom be glory now and evermore. Amen! The Kiss: Minister: Tim, you may now kiss your Bride. Editor's note: Tim and Casey kiss, followed by lots of clapping, whistling, and joyful, but respectful noise from the congregation, including from Your Editor. Presentation of the Couple: Minister: It is now my privilege to introduce to you for the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Pelfrey.
Left: Uncle Dave, Paris, Rory, Mike and Casey pose for my digital camera. Right: Tim and Casey cut the wedding cake. Recessional and Exit Music: Celtic Women: The Blessing (Recessional; stretched,) Celtic Women: The Prayer (Alternate Recessional,) Mariah Carey and Brian McKnight: Whenever You Call. Thank you, Larry Sutter, for providing with your notes from the wedding ceremony, in order to help me write this article. So that was it, as I watched Casey and Tim march down the aisle as husband and wife, followed by the bridesmaids and groomsmen, my digital camera clicking away photos, to record the whole event. But I only had a momentary release from my responsibilities of host, as now I had to direct our many guests to the catered food, provided by Sandra Dee's Barbecue, to check the ice chests again, and to make sure that everything was in order.
Left: Naturally, they have to force-feed the wedding cake to each other. Right: The bride and groom dance to the tune of one of the many fine country ballads the disk jockey played for our guests. The dj really kept things moving. Just after the ceremony, the disc jockey started his show. We'd hired him for hours, from 1500 to 1900, to play all varieties of music, from country to oldies, however at Casey's request, and at my blessing, country music would be the favored type of music featured, but other types of music weren't excluded, as we wanted to cater to everybody's taste, as much as possible. Our disk jockey really did a fantastic job, as he photographic memory when it came to people's names, and seemed to really be able to judge the mood of our guests, and play the right selection at the right time, and gauge the tempo of the event. Also, he kept the music at a volume where you could actually carry on a conversation, yet the dancers could properly enjoy the music. After the ceremony concluded, I grabbed some of the guys, and we carried folding chairs to the patio, and arranged tables and chairs under the big top tent. We also set up tables on the patio where our guests could dine, and brought chairs inside, so some of the guests who chose to remain inside our air-conditioned house, would have a place to sit. Of course the chore of making all of this happen was my responsibility, and with lots of teamwork, we did make it happen. Also, I engaged myself in attending to the ice chests, and making sure that they were always full of drinks and ice, and of course, mingling with our many wonderful guests.
Left: As Casey and Tim dance, Paris show everybody that he's no slouch on the dance floor, as Jacquie eggs him on. Right: Tim and Casey share a romantic dance. Urged on by the photographer we hired, the wedding party retreated to the front yard, where the formal photos were taken. I managed to figure out what was going on, and slipped away from my social duties, to snap a few photos. Then, it was back to the patio, to eat a plate of delicious barbecue, to chat and mingle with the guests, and to observe Casey and Tim cut the wedding cake, and stuff a piece into each other's mouth. After the cake was cut up and distributed to everyone, I noticed that most of our guests only took a small bite out of their serving, as when you get down to reality, who really likes to eat wedding cake? Naturally, Casey and Tim danced their first dance together, as husband and wife, to the delight of the guests. After Casey and Tim's wedding dance, the dance floor really opened up, and many of our guests danced to the music. Our patio is the perfect place to hold a dance, as its big and quite open, and by the time the dancing started in earnest, the entire patio was shaded, and the temperature had lowered to around 90 degrees. Actually, due to the shade and a couple of misting fans, it was quite comfortable on the patio. Our family likes to dance using various formats, such as married couples, moms and sons, and then there's the ol' swap-a-roo where everybody dances with everybody, but nobody outdid our grandson Paris. He got on the dance floor and amused everybody by his break-dance, limbo-rock style of whatever-you-want-to call it. Paris is always a crowd-pleaser, and today, he was truly in his element. Untrue to my usual form, I only danced a couple of dances, as I was busy being the host, plus candid-shots photographer, and frankly, I was tired to the bone.
Left: The disk jockey we hired really kept things going, and seemed to know everybody's name, and what to say at the right time. He also played an outstanding selection of contemporary music. Right: Casey and Tim, Nicole and Jake, dancing on our patio. The disk jockey stayed around until 1900, as per our agreement, and after he packed up and left, we dragged out a boombox to continue the music, and Casey gave her consent to open the bar. I'd stocked the bar to prepare almost any drink, but after the big day, about the only drinks that I dispensed was beer, Margaritas, and an occasional Strawberry Daiquiri. Mostly the remaining guests just sort of sat around in small circles and talked, and enjoyed each other's company. Later in the evening, Sharlene brought out a veggie tray, dips and a few plates of appetizers, which made the evening interesting. By 2200, only a few members of the wedding party remained, and at that time, we started the preliminary cleanup, mostly inside the house. Normally, we are very concerned about the cleanliness of our house, but today, since we had more than a houseful, we resigned ourselves to the fact that the house would get dirty, and that it would be loaded with unwelcome guests, mainly flies. We weren't disappointed as the house was dirty, and loaded with flies. However we were tired, and the cleanup would have to wait until Sunday morning.
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